?

The title of this post is "?" because I've thought about it and nothing I can think of covers all the "topics" that will be smushed into this one post.

I just feel like I'm not.. Ugh idk how to put this into words..
Okay well with the friendships I have I always put so much effort and emotion to make sure the other person is happy and that I'm being a good friend but I just feel that I don't get anything in return.
I have great friends but that's on and off. Sometimes they ignore me and you just don't do that.
Plus I really care how my friends feel and I never want to make them mad or sad and I don't most of the time but let's say I like this guy... And my friend likes the same guy... I will ask her how she feels about him and comment how we both like the same guy and how I don't want it to effect us.
But then when we are by this guy, yes I flirt but nothing hardcore just joking around and stuff but she will stop at no cost until she has won him over and when we talk she always says "well we aren't dating yet" like my feelings don't even matter.
I love all my friends and I don't wanna lose them I just want to be "respected" (I don't know if that would be the right word) more.
I'm the person who always wants to have fun and include people but when drama arises I try to avoid it when it doesn't include me and that makes people mad sometimes. I don't know why... But whatever
This is all just babble.
I just need to post these things to get it out of my head.
I probably seem like a loser but I'm actually really fun in person ;) ha
................................................................I guess that's it.


*** and yes I just post random pics with every post ***

For years...

For years I've know him.
I've watched him flirt and I've watched him go through a relationship.
For years he's the one I couldn't ever stop thinking about.
Infatuation? Or love?
I didn't care.
Now, nothing has changed...
It's almost became worse. Ha yeah.. Worse
I just can't tell him how I feel
It's too much.
Maybe I'm afraid of rejection.
Maybe.
But then.. Wildly.
He kissed me.
What?! Me? Why?
Maybe he missed my cheek? With his tongue.
For years I've know him
I've spent hours and hours by his side
One night, he did it.
Maybe because he knows how I feel
Is it possible it could be mutual?
Probably not.
It was just a kiss after all

But for me, for a girl
Like me.. It was... Something words can't describe.
For years I've watched him, cared for him, maybe even lived him..
Now I wait.
Quietly. Never brave enough to confess

But isn't it obvious? I think it is

For years I've hidden.. And I don't think that will change for years to come.

Me.

I'm me and only me. People will judge and that's okay. I won't change for anyone. Staying true to yourself is important.
Remember to stay true and stay you
I might not be model pretty with perfect skin, the biggest boobs, the skinniest stomach, or the cutest smile.
But I know some day I will find my prince.
The guy who sees me for me and excepts it.
The guy who knows my flaws and knows my story and sticks around.
Patience is what u need. Patience is what we all need.

Rewind.

We used to happy, we used to be best friends.
You were the only one i thought I could tell everything too.
Then you left like nothing ever happened.
I was nothing

You erased me so easily. Why?
I know it's not all your fault but I still think about you....
....a lot.

You want her. I get it.
I just miss us, being just friends even.

You totally forgot and I always remember.

Whatta joke.
But I can still say.. I love you- & I hate it:/

Trust

Such an important thing.
Easy to start.
Easy to end.

Anyone out there?!

So I have like no clue on how to look at other blogs& i dont even know if people are looking at mine..
Anyone out there?!?!!
Commentt:)
Do you like my blogs?!
What should i write about? Show my perspective on anything particularr?!

Two words

Scared& insecure.
If those things didn't consume me right now everything would work out.
Ugh, I wish I could zap these feelings away.
But I can't.
Scared& insecure.
Don't let them over power you.

Too hot. Too old. & Too far away.

Interesting title. This happens to be my best friend& I's motto about boys because it always applies to us.
Whenever we meet someone interesting and they are interested in us they are either TOO HOT, TOO OLD, OR THEY LIVE TOO FAR AWAY.
By too hot, i mean that they are way too attractive to ever end up with a girl like me.
My friends say i judge myself too harsh& critically but i think they just say that cuz they are my friends and they have too;)
I'm not disgusting- well i hope not.. ;););)
but idk, i have low self esteem when it comes to attractive boys..lol
And that comes as a surprise too many people i know because they all know me as confident Rosie& SUPER boy crazyy
By too old i mean, i usually meet boys that are 18 and older that im most interested in and that doesnt work for me because im so young.
I hate it but i just cant help it.
too far away_ i usually meet them at camp or at eveents and they end up living 3 to 4 hours away up to 24 hours away... My luckkk

There are boys in my school that i am interested in but i dont want just some ol' stupid and quick highschool relationship.
everyone tells me to not grow up so fast but its me& i cant help it
 I can write a million more pages on this one guy that was interested in me but i dont want this to contain dramaa. ha
                                  ~~all i can say is one word== CONFUSION

Mature. Happy. Summer. Hot mess

I don't think any of us really mature.
As we grow up we just learn how to act in public.
We will always be who we are.
Do try to hide it.
Be respectful& control yourself.
But never change, &if u have too...
Change for the better.
..............................................
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Im licensed. Have freedoms.
It's new& scary but we all grow up
Nothing we should fret about
*********
This post is all over the place but whatevsss;)

Today was a decent day. Weathers getting warmer, sunny, can't help but smile.
Can where my birks now!!:P

Only 11 more Mondays until schools out!
Summer is so close, but yet sooo far away.
I can't wait for that last bell I ring& let summer really begin.
Each day brings us closer and the excitement rises.
So pumped..

Ugly

Today in our society it is very important to ppl on how they look.
I think too many ppl are putting too much time on something that's not so important, like looking in the mirror.
I feel like girls aren't girls anymore.
Most mask up their faces with pounds of makeup& go tanning to have that fake glow on them all year around.
Now I'll pause, yea I wear makeup duh, I have a girly side and I love it but it's when you look like a totally different person, u have a little too much on.
& I have tanned before, it's nice but when you orange honey, that doesn't look so hot, that's just my opinion.
Not being rude but.. Whatever
Being natural an yourself doesn't make you ugly.
We should all learn to have a positive self image.
Girls, be comfortable in ur own skin.
Personally I have to work on that as well.
I'm not gonna lie when I look in the mirror I do wish things were different and we shouldn't look at ourselves like that.
When I look in the mirror I just think that God made me in his image and loves me for me.
I have great people in my life and I know I should recognize the good features & not on the not so good features.
Everyone has flaws.
Plain&simple.
I think the day we all realize that, we'll be one step closer to a better world.



Confidence.
Be You.
Beauty isn't makeup.

Rosie defined

Going through high school is tough for some and easy&breezy for others, for me I'm in between. 
Im not the dork or nerd, or "that hot girl" or the popular one.
Im me..
I consider myself popular by my own definition; im friends with everyone & except everyone
I get good grades& enjoy the weekend
i study hard& embarrass myself with my friends
im not saying im perfect and never judge people
we all make mistakes


the one word used to describe me would be: UNIQUE
i think thats the only word that sums everything upp.
im Uniquely Hearted


i absolutely love hanging out with my friends& laughing and just enjoying life
i hate getting caught up in drama- theres NO neeed for it..fo sho!


one quote i live by& love is::::
"It's better to be absolutely ridiculous, than to be absolutely boring."

Just Getting Started

Oh heeyyy
Im just starting off this blogging kinda thing& I dont even know if people will read.
im young, and this is just gonna be a place for me to write & express my feeling. a place to get to know me and the crazy thing i call my personality. ;)
Im not perfect& there are gonna be alot of spelling errors